Have you ever pondered ‘why do we take so much pain for giving gifts to our loved ones?’ Culture of gift exchanging is not restricted to a country or a religion. It is the universal way of expressing love and appreciation. In this ever changing world this aspect of our tradition seems to be eternal. Why?
Let’s try to understand the whole concept in the light of psychology. According to Devin A. Byrd (associate professor of behavioural sciences) we all feel an emotional lift while searching for a meaningful present for our dear ones. It is better to give than to receive because giving is an act of munificence— unselfish concern for the pleasure of others. When we give without any expectation, we are improving our happiness quotient and also psychological health. The ritual of gift giving has more psychological benefit for us than any one specific present.
Although gift-giving can be a de-stressor and create balance, the hunt for the perfect gift for friends and family can also cause a lot of stress. The costs of presents and what it takes to package them can be a financial burden. But there is an enormous sense of satisfaction when seeing the blissful expression on the face of recipient on unwrapping of present you’ve given. It is the perfect way to express feelings and appreciating each other.
Gift-giving is also a way for the giver to reduce guilt. This guilt can be for hurting someone or for not being present when you were expected. In such circumstances the carefully selected present can say ‘sorry’ or ‘miss you’ more effectively than words.
According to Silvernail, gift giving is also driven by a positive psychology that “if you do something positive you attract positive.” People don’t always give just to get something back. Usually the thought behind giving is ‘if I’ll do a good deed, something good will definitely happens to me.’ But, the expectation of reciprocity often comes with it.
Presents can also bring on feelings of negativity for both the giver and recipient when it is much more or much less than the expectation. “A person can have immediate feelings of resentment if they feel a person has not spent enough,” Byrd says. “They feel undervalued or cheated.”
After considering psychological aspect of this whole process we can understand the reasons behind gift giving:
- An altruistic wish to make someone happy- This is an ideal approach of gift-giving.
- A sense of obligation- Age-old traditions and customs of our society compel us to do so on certain occasions like weddings, birthdays and festivals.
- Joy of giving- On giving we feel generous and useful and it also increases our sense of self-esteem.
Psychology of Gift giving is very closely related to human nature. It is very interesting to know that giving satisfies us more than receiving. Thanks to all thoughtful psychologists for explaining us the significance of this ageless phenomenon of gift exchanging.
